Do you have a voice in your head?
Because I do, and the last week or so, it’s really been fucking with me quite badly.
Before I get into that and go deeper than usual, a quick analogy not only makes a lot of sense to me, but it’s also something I’ve been thinking about a lot the last while.
Imagine that the voice in your head is like a border collie puppy. Now depending on how you take care of this puppy, one of two things is going to happen. If you take the puppy outside and give it lots of attention and exercise, it’ll be fun to play with and not have all the excess anxious energy when you bring it back into the. On the other hand, if you do not take care of it and give it exercise, it’s more than likely going to start chewing the couches in the house.
Get it?
On top of that, I had a very interesting discussion with one of my coaching clients this week where we spoke about how your headspace and the voices inside literally change from day to night.
You see, I’m working on a project that is very personal and important to me, as well as scares the shit out of me, and a few days ago I was actually quite shocked when I realised how much the voice in my head went from supportive and confident to negative and despondent when I turned off the light to go to bed.
I was busy writing text for a web page that has to do with my white whale goal. As I was writing, I felt pretty good about it. I felt confident and pretty excited for how things were coming together and for what it could potentially lead to.
A little while later, I turned off the light and went to bed.
I normally don’t have a problem falling asleep, but since I was working for quite some time, my head was still spinning with excitement, possibilities, and a feeling that things were heading in the right direction.
It didn’t take long, in the dark, for the border collie puppy to start chewing the couch. And we’re not talking just a little nibble; we’re talking ripping chunks out of it.
There’s a reason why you should never believe your own thoughts in the middle of the night; everything feels worse, more intense, and, more often than not, way more negative than you might actually be as a person.
The next morning, as expected, I felt better about the work I had done so far, but the border collie puppy was still trying to chew the couch. And even though I’ve given him attention, played with him, and tried to discipline him, he’s still staring at the couch, wanting to go and take a bite.
Yeah, the negative voices in our heads always seem to be so much louder and more persistent than the positive ones. And they seem to leave some or other mental hangover, which is just enough to make you question yourself.
Does this make any sense, <<First Name>>?
Can you think of a time when you were feeling quite good about something? It could be a project at work, a new business venture, a new relationship, consistency in a physical fitness programme, boundaries that you may have set up, or anything else that the voice in your head congratulated you for.
Then, can you recall the time when, either in the middle of the evening or even sometimes at a random point throughout the day, the border collie puppy started chewing the couches and you started doubting yourself, even though a few moments before you were quite confident with who you are and what you were working on?
This is the resistance that Stephen Pressfield speaks about in The War of Art.
This is the dark wolf from the Cherokee story that is taking over from the white wolf.
This is negativity being stronger and louder than positivity.
But most importantly, this is self-imposed doubt in order to stop yourself from the embarrassment of failure.
Perhaps, and yes, I’m 100% talking to myself here as well, the reason we get embarrassed at the idea of failure and we impose all these ridiculous fears and dust into our own heads is because we care deeply enough about the outcome of whatever it is we’re working on.
Before I carry on, if you have something in mind that resonates with the above, whether a project, incident, dream, or white whale goal that you doubt yourself on, I would really love for you to reply to this email and share it with me.
Anyway, let’s get into this.
As you know, I’ve been talking about my white whale goal for the last few months. I’ve taken a couple of steps towards this ridiculously ambitious goal, and since returning from Svalbard in March, where I completed an Arctic training expedition course, it’s been difficult not to think about the next step.
In case you missed it, in the last two newsletters, I shared thoughts about the experience and some deeper feelings that I was left with. You can reduce those two newsletters by using the links below.
To say that that particular trip was life-changing is actually underplaying it quite a bit, and the amount of perspective, personal growth, and clarity of mind I’ve had since has been both surprising and amazing.
Having completed that part of the goal, I started looking forward to the next step in my journey.
A week or so ago, just finishing a photo tour in Svalbard, I received an email to confirm that I’d been accepted onto an expedition team in Greenland in 2025, which, as some of you may know, is the next step towards the ultimate white whale that I’ve set for myself.
This news was both amazing and scary as shit at the same time.
- Small expedition team.
- 25 to 28 days on the ice.
- 540km total distance.
- Dragging a sled of around 75 kg (165 lbs) all the way.
- Crossing Greenland.
Now, as much as that excites me, it raises a lot of questions in my mind, as the amount of preparation, physically and mentally, for something like this is a pretty big deal.
That said, I’ve always been slightly on the competitive side, and something like this, along to go to work towards it’s something that I know focuses my border collie puppy on something other than chewing the couches in the house.
The amount of focus, preparation, and dedication to a singular purpose is something that I know brings value to any person.
I experienced this personally in March, and it’s something that I’ve been trying to install in all my clients that I’ve been working with.
That said, the scariest thing that’s been floating around in my mind hasn’t been the mental or physical preparation for a month-long expedition in 2025 in subzero temperatures. It has been how I can actually make it happen.
You see, in order for me to make this expedition a reality, I am going to have to look at raising funds through donations and sponsorships. I’ve already done a lot of groundwork, and I have started building a webpage on my website as well as secured a local media partner through which I will be able to raise awareness for an amazing charity organisation whose mission is to bring value to various causes ranging from humanitarian welfare and education to medical and animal welfare.
So after having created this webpage and feeling pretty confident about the whole thing, my border collie puppy started nibbling on the couch again.
The reality of the matter is that I would have to raise a small initial amount in a pretty short time period in order to confirm my participation in the expedition, followed by the balance at the end of September this year.
My initial idea was to share the link to the webpage in this newsletter, but then self-doubt crept in.
Am I good enough? Will I be able to pull this off? What if I’m not good enough? What will people think if I try and fail. What if I don’t deserve this?
Those are just some of the thoughts that, for the last few days, have been floating around in my head. And yes, it gets way worse in the evenings in the dark at around 1:37 p.m.
So there it is. I know how this works, I know how to help people manage these kinds of thoughts and get back on track while working towards something that they really, really want. That they really, really need.
It’s time to listen to my own advice, harden the fuck up, and do what I need to do in order to take the next step towards my ultimate white whale goal.
There is a quote that I’m sure you’ve heard that goes something like “never give up on something you can’t go a day without thinking about.” That’s kind of where I find myself now. I need to to tell stories that inspire, share insights on physical and mental fitness and resilience, and share lessons learned from the extremes of the human experience.
My goal, as it stands, is to make the webpage live before I head out again on Wednesday this coming week. Even if it means going live, failing to execute, and confirming next year’s expedition, this will only mean that the timeline extends slightly, but I know, deep down I know, that this is going to happen.
Thank you for reading this far, but I’d like to ask you one last favour. If you do not receive an email from me by the end of Wednesday this week sharing the link to this new page on my website, I’d like for you to hold me accountable, send me a message, and check why I haven’t done it yet.
The magic I’m looking for is in the work I’m avoiding.
That’s it for now.
If you have something you’ve been wanting to get done but have stalled, delayed, and given yourself every excuse in the book not to execute, please see this as my official request that you get your shit together and get it done.
Let’s do this!
