Stop bullshitting yourself

I’m sure we can agree that life is hard sometimes.

I’m not so sure that we will agree on this next statement though.

Your life is harder and more stressful and more challenging because of the bullshit lies you keep telling yourself.

Yeah, you heard that right.

The vast majority of people out there lie to themselves on pretty much a daily basis in order for them to validate to themselves that they are the victim and that there’s nothing they can do about how hard their life is.

You want a better life?

You want to be better as a person?

Then you need to stop lying to yourself.

Wait, before you lie to yourself again and convince yourself that this does not apply to you, bear with me for a second.

Years ago in the late 80s, some horribly cruel researchers stuck a dog in a cage, left the door open, and ran an electric current through the floor.

The dog yelped and ran from the cage. Then they put the dog back in the cage, locked the door and repeatedly shocked the floor. The dog went nuts trying to get out, until it finally realized there was no escape. The dog just lay there, stoically accepting the pain.

At that point, when the dog was defeated, the researchers opened the cage door and shocked the floor again. The dog felt the shock, looked at the open door, and basically said, “Screw it. There’s no point fighting anymore. I may as well just lay here and take it.”

That is learned helplessness.

Are you the dog in the cage?

Have you convinced yourself that there is no hope to even try and escape the cage you find yourself in? The cage you keep reinforcing with the bullshit lies you tell yourself?

You don’t think you bullshit yourself?

Any of these sound familiar? 🧐

I don’t have time.

I don’t understand why I keep repeating the same mistakes.

I don’t know why my boss is always on my case.

I don’t know why my head is always so busy when I try to sleep.

She is crazy or doesn’t understand me.

I don’t understand why the universe keeps me from what I really want.

I don’t know how to loose this extra weight.

I really try and nothing ever changes.

I’m not really that out of shape.

I’m healthy and have always been in good shape.

If I just love them enough they will change.

I don’t really drink that much.

Social media really isn’t affecting me as much as people say.

If I just hang in there things will get better.

My family just don’t understand me.

I’m not in as bad a shape as what people say.

I’ll start tomorrow.

People don’t like me.

I can deal with it on my own.

I don’t have a problem.

I don’t care what he / she thinks of me.

I got myself into this mess, I need to get myself out of it.

My mental health is doing okay.

Nobody will ever know.

Things will never get better.

Things will get better on it’s own.

I’m just not good enough.

I don’t deserve to feel better.

I can stop anytime I want.

I don’t need help.

I have time.

You want a better life?

You want to be better as a person?

Then you need to stop lying to yourself.

I promise you this… the moment you look at yourself in mirror, harden up and and start being honest with yourself – when you start seeing that the cage door is actually open – that is the moment your life will start changing.

I’m not saying it will be easy.

I can tell you from experience that it’s not.

You will doubt yourself.

Feel embarrassed.

You’ll get angry at yourself.

And sad.

You’ll feel helpless.

You’ll want to hide away from the questions.

And the answers.

It might be one of the most difficult and rewarding things you ever do in your life.

But I’ll say this again…

You want a better life?